She didn’t want to be there in the first place. It was hard for her to accept the fact that the rest of her family was so willing to move on while she was still trying to hold onto the past. This isn’t right, she thought to herself. How am I supposed to walk into this place and find another Chloe`? But walk in, she did.
At first, the place reminded her of a hospital. The kind of hospital where she watched Chloe` breathe her last breath. The kind of hospital where the doctor told her, “we’re sorry, there’s nothing else we could do.” It was the disease that did her in, not the doctor’s, but it always mad Jessica feel better to think that they had something to do with Chloe’s passing. She knew it was wrong of her to think this way, but she felt like someone should take the blame for the death of her best friend.
That night was still fresh in Jessica’s mind. Getting into bed that night, she looked across the room to see Chloe` in her bed crying, whimpering. She was so old now; her hair was so thin. It resembled a light fog that seemed to engulf Chloe` wherever she went. This fog, which no matter how hard Jessica tried to brush and care for it, would never resemble the white, curly hair that used to grow in its place.
This new place, with this old dreadful feeling, was not completely like the hospital that Chloe` had lost her fight to Cancer in. This place was filled with happy faces, and plenty of options. Jessica and her mother walked up the receptionist, telling them what they were looking for. The young woman with the dark green eyes smiled at them and told Jessica’s mother that they had come to the right place. Within a few minutes, another worker was there to help assist them in making their choice. They walked down the hallway into the first room.
“These are the bigger ones. Most of them are older than what people are normally looking for, but they all have great personalities”, he said with a reassuring smile. Jessica walked in first with her mother close behind. The nose was deafening at first. She had to stand in place for a moment, to get used to the nose. Her mother walked passed her and starting going down the row to view the options. Jessica just stood there. The barking dogs may not have seemed so intimidating to her if she saw them one at a time, but with all of them in the same row of kennels, it was too much for her to bare. Labordors, Pitbulls, Shepards, and tons of dogs that seemed to be a mix. All of them barking at her, wagging their tails. She couldn’t tell if their barks were friendly or a warning. She became so overwhelmed with the noise.
She didn’t want to do this in the first place. How could she choose just one? It was impossible. They were all so big; was this really what her mother had in mind? After a few minutes, Jesscia’s mother walked back towards the beginning of the row towards Jessica.
“They’re a little too big for our house I think. My husband will have a fit if I come home with something this size.” What did she think she was adopting, furniture? Jessica couldn’t understand how the woman that brought her here to adopt a new dog could talk so emotionless about the animals in those kennels.
She was there, Jessica thought. She was the one that drove while I held Chloe` in my arms on the way to the emergency vet in the pouring rain. She’s the one that woke me up the next morning to sit with her because she couldn’t bare the silence of house after Chloe` passed. How could she simply rule out a dog simply because of its size. With that, the friendly man nodded and walked them back into the hallway.
The man explained that at this time, their shelter only had larger dogs that were suitable to be adopted. Jessica was relieved. She didn’t have to forget Chloe` just yet. They didn’t have to throw out her old toys, and get a new doggy bed for some replacement dog that her mother felt that she “needed.” He did however, hand Jessica’s mother a list of other shelters in the area that they could try. With that, Jessica’s mother thanked him, and they walked out of the shelter.
“We’ll find one soon Jess”, her mother said as they walked to the car. “We can try again tomorrow.”
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